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madness

The Madness of Scriptwriting

Here’s interesting feedback I have received this week so far (and it’s only Tuesday): “What I like about this script is it’s tightly structured and draws to a satisfying conclusion.” Compared with: “I had no idea what was going on here, you need to decide on a path for your characters – and give them a destination too, there was no dramatic satisifaction to your ending.” These were both for the same script by the way. This WAS going to be an inspirational post about not letting the bastards grind you down, not everyone will like your stuff even if… Read More »The Madness of Scriptwriting

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Something For The (Bank Holiday) Weekend

I’m quite used to people dropping by this blog looking for “werewolf sex” and “talking dirty scripts” by now: you’re even welcome to “take a bubble bath with no pants on” whilst “having flashbacks all day.” Please – make yourselves at home. Could this be, however, the craziest Google Search ever? “The horse’s bits were covered in foam.” WTF? What in the name of all that is holy could this Googler actually be looking for? And how on earth did Google direct them to MY BLOG? I have no recollection of dicussing foam or horse’s bits or covering any bits… Read More »Something For The (Bank Holiday) Weekend

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She’s Electric

Interesting fact: I affect radio waves. It’s quite annoying a lot of the time, ‘cos if I stand too near a radio it makes this godawful ccccccccccccccrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr noise. But on days like today it can be quite fun: various radio station signals jump from one to the next as I walk about my kitchen, like I have my very own mix tape. Nice. A not so interesting fact: I have ants in my kitchen. I’ve gone Sigourney on their asses but they’re still coming in from a PLACE UNKNOWN. Presumably the garden. I’m slightly concerned they may walk the wee… Read More »She’s Electric

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Highs & Lows

This writing thing is great, I love it. But it also sucks. Big time. It’s inevitable that if things go well, they have to be pretty rubbish as well. It’s balance, just part of life: stuff goes up, it’s gotta come down too – else how will you ever know how good, good is if you haven’t also experienced the bad? That’s what I’m telling myself at the moment, anyway. I’m feeling pretty dejected about the state of my career at the moment – I’ve had a few too many rejections close together, basically – and I’m wondering if I… Read More »Highs & Lows

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Weekend Madness

My son announced rather excitably at breakfast this morning that none other than Shakespeare is coming into to his school to do a drama workshop today. How cool is that? Well I’m also a cool Mum (natch) so I say (you’ll love this), “Excellent news, boyo. Did Shakespeare hitch a ride through time in the TARDIS with Dr. Who & Martha?” “No Mum,” My son explains very patiently, “Not only is Shakespeare totally dead, the bloke coming into today is an actor. And by the way, Dr. Who is also an actor. And so is Martha.” Just in case I… Read More »Weekend Madness

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Experiencing Technical Difficulties

Write Here, Write Now has been flagged as a spam blog! Outrage! I wondered why I wasn’t able to save posts any longer as I was working on them and kept losing stuff (so I hope you’ve been appreciating my last few posts, they took frickin’ ages! Okay, I should have just clicked the “what’s this?” button on the word verifier thingie ten days ago but that would have been too easy). But anyway, whilst I iron out this not-so-teensy issue with Blogger (and write my posts in Word first!), feast your eyes on this fantastic video courtesy of the… Read More »Experiencing Technical Difficulties

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How To Use Plot Devices – Voiceover, Flashback, Montage, Intercut and Dream Sequence

Plot Devices With A Bad Name … There are lots of plot devices in scriptwriting we hear are “frowned on”. We shouldn’t use voiceover or flashback is the usual (or voiceover WITH flashback!). I’ve also heard montage maligned in a similar fashion, as well as intercut and dream sequence. This is a load of rot as far as I’m concerned. You can use what you like. These accusations we see levied like “flashback is a lazy way of telling a story” is just another generalisation. Flashback can be an amazingly dramatic way to tell a story. … For A REASON!!… Read More »How To Use Plot Devices – Voiceover, Flashback, Montage, Intercut and Dream Sequence

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Princess Pants is ill

Lilirose has been sent home from nursery – so that’s my productivity for today shot, though I was relieved to hear it wasn’t chickenpox as first thought. Regardless, she is making VERY SURE I know how much she is suffering: today has involved much wailing, gnashing of teeth and general crying. And that’s just me. Remind me: I had kids again because…?

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Wishing You All A Very…

Oh and if you want to know what The Easter Bunny is doing the other 364 days of the year, check this out: You have been warned…

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Glory! # 2

Last week I broke the exciting news that I was cited as a reference in Wikipedia. This week I have discovered I have made it (in the same way) into the Wiktionary too!!! The word? Kitchen-sinky. My people will call your people. MWAH.

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Fat Eyelid

There are many strange things in the world. Like alien abduction. Aurora Borealis. Geysers. Children’s odd ability to say exactly the wrong thing at the wrong time, right at some toe-curling moment. Strangest however, is the fact that for no apparent reason at all this evening I seem to have a fat eyelid. I’m not kidding. The difference between them is quite obvious. I’ve had it narrowed down to two things by my ex-biologist hubby: I’m allergic to my sexy new silver eyeshadow or I’ve somehow sprained it. WTF? How can you SPRAIN your eyelid? Unless of course I have… Read More »Fat Eyelid

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The Story Of My Blog… Told in Bizarre Keywords

All these are 100% GENUINE: what’s scarier: the fact Searchers find these words on my blog or the fact that I’ve collected all of these SINCE ONLY LAST WEDNESDAY? [Nb. Actual keyword searches are in italics.] Enjoy…———————————————————-Mistress Vee A dominatrix Tell us like it is Because I’m f***ing Matt Damon and Mrs. McClusky while taking another bubble bath with my pants on. I must Kill Dave Because I’m a Triad Manchester Chinese And if Monster movies reflect current social fears then what a travel agent might say at work suddenly becomes super sexual dialogue for talking dirty scripts and werewolf… Read More »The Story Of My Blog… Told in Bizarre Keywords

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