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Hello, My Name Is Lucy And I Am A Schedule-holic

I have a confession. Whilst I know all about the idea of TV “on demand” services, even applaud them, I don’t use them. I don’t even think about it. Does that make me a bad person? A TV-holic friend of mine thinks so: every time I say I “missed” a programme (a rare occurrence, but can happen), she chastises me with, “But you have it at your fingertips!”

And it’s true, I do. I could easily call up BBC iPlayer (in my defence, I actually have at least twice, I even downloaded an episode of Ashes To Ashes but then forgot to watch it – FOR THIRTY DAYS); I could download 4OD or look at ITV or C5 catch ups of my favourite soaps, dramas and documentaries or sign up to a whole host of other options. But nothing moves me to move AWAY from my TV schedule, watching programmes when they’re put out – or not. What’s more, I NEVER press the red button.

For shame.

“You can watch today’s TV – tomorrow.” One of the adverts say. What a great idea. I’m a busy person, I need never miss a programme I like or want to see ever again. So why don’t I???

I know what it is, of course. I’m OLD. This is what my mother meant when she said there would *suddenly* be new inventions, technology or ways of thinking that would suddenly seem irrelevant to me. And it’s happened! Already! In Ye Olden Days, aka My Era, if you missed a programme on TV you might get the chance of a repeat in soaps ominbus or another for a drama about six months later. THAT WAS IT. And I still live in those days, like my Gran who would never eat pizza because it was (and I quote) “foreign food”. Why am I finding it so hard to make the transition into “on demand”???

Because I am a stick in the mud.

I recall telling my friends when aged only 16 that cassettes were *way* better than CDs because they were “more portable”. I was also of the opinion the internet would “never catch on” – pages were only full of porn and students going on about their fave bands, after all. I have never even TOUCHED an iPod, let alone used one: I’ve not even listened to a podcast. I’ve never played on a games console and the only one in my ohouse is an old school PS2 my husband brought with him when we got married (I pick it up occasionally to dust underneath). PDAs are alien to me and a blackberry is only useful for jam. I resisted getting Freeview until LAST YEAR, I’ve never had Sky or cable. Minidiscs passed me by completely and the only music on my PC is stuff I’ve uploaded from CDs, I have no MP3s downloaded, legally OR illegally. But I do HAVE a CD player – there’s not one single cassette in my house now. I also have a laptop, but I bought it at Tesco, not one of those fancy shops. It’s not a Mac though. I’m not one of those people that think mobile phones are evil either, I love my phone – but I’ve had the same one for 4 years, it doesn’t even ring anymore.

Baby steps.

Maybe I’ll catch up with the rest of you… In ten years. Just as well I’m only 28, hey?

What things seem completely irrelevant to you? Go on… Don’t be shy.

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7 thoughts on “Hello, My Name Is Lucy And I Am A Schedule-holic”

  1. Welcome to the world of the luddite.

    I tried computer games in the 80s and decided they were way too boring so haven’t touched them since. I have to confess to getting Black and White when it came out years ago but it’s still in my laptop bag waiting to be loaded.

    My mobile is for emergencies only. You know the ones. When you are trapped in the cold section of Tescos and you can’t remember how many scrapes are left in the tub of marg at home.

    An iPod is a TV for ants and a wee is something the bathroom is for.

    And missed programmes? If I’m too busy to watch it the first time then I’m too busy to wait forever for it to download andthen watch it.

    It has to be really special for me to make that sacrifice so Dr Who and Top Gear only. See my high standards.

    So what could I do without? Bluetooth. I want the option to say I couldn’t find the phone in my bag in time and to not look like the cybermen have been recruiting.

    I also like to know if the person screaming and ranting as they walk towards me is on a phone or is a complete psycho. (Or if the Cybermen have been recruiting obviously).

  2. I have a PS3 but only to watch bluray on, I haven’t a clue about the games. I did get my son-in-law to talk me though playing Oblivion but I died within the first thirty seconds distracted by his mocking laughter.

    I do have a BlackBerry and I have to say I find it really useful, though I share Rach’s concerns about screaming nutters approaching me in the street, until I realise I’m related to them obviously.

    I certainly can’t be bothered to record stuff off the telly. The only time I tried it the memory was chocka with Dog the Bounty Hunter. And so, a guilty pleasure was born!

  3. With only 3 days to go to my 38th (!) birthday, I do sympathise with you. I feel I’m growing very old…very quick!!

    I used to be so ‘Tech Savvy’in my teens – with ‘front loading’ VHS recorders, Camcorders (the kind you had to actually rest on your shoulder!)and the cassette walkman (using all the battery life ‘Fast Forwarding’ to the ONE song you actually wanted to listen to! None of this ‘skipping’ like they do these days. ‘Skipping’ was done in the schoolyard. By girls. With their skirts tucked into their pants!!).

    I believe I started being technologically-left-behind when I neglected to take O Level Computer Studies (AKA: IT) as one of my options. Computers??? Naaaaa. Never take off….Likewise, I thought it was a lot of fuss over nothing!!!

    So now I’m forced to struggle against the tide of technology, as it batters my ISP!!! All I ever seem to get my computer to do is:
    E-MAIL (provided it doesn’t require too many files attached to it!!)
    ‘Cut and Paste’ is STILL a mystery to me!!!!!

    Everything seems to be moving too fast. You buy one gadget, and within a week the brand new, super-duper version is on the shelves, making yours obsolete!!

    People are even telling ME I’m too old….”Facebook!!??? What are you doing on there??? You’re ancient!!” As if you are not allowed to socially interact beyond a certain age!!!

    Any way…I’m ranting. Back to your question. ‘What is irrelevant to me?’…..Easy…..

    My Parents. Having to listen to them ‘banging on’ about the good old days, and how life was so much ‘simpler’ then…..

    …I couldn’t be like them!!!!!!

  4. 28? Old?! You’re not old, you’re just, um, behind the times… Although, I’m slowly catching up with the 20th century never mind the 21st.

  5. I think I am too though Danny – that’s the problem! Anyway, you have an iPod in the very least don’tcha??

    But having said all that, I just got asked for ID in Waitrose when buying a 4 pk of beer – not for the first time either, lol.

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