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Weekend Madness

My son announced rather excitably at breakfast this morning that none other than Shakespeare is coming into to his school to do a drama workshop today. How cool is that? Well I’m also a cool Mum (natch) so I say (you’ll love this), “Excellent news, boyo. Did Shakespeare hitch a ride through time in the TARDIS with Dr. Who & Martha?”

“No Mum,” My son explains very patiently, “Not only is Shakespeare totally dead, the bloke coming into today is an actor. And by the way, Dr. Who is also an actor. And so is Martha.”

Just in case I was under any illusions there: shattered.

In other news, as my daughter’s second birthday swiftly approaches at the beginning of next month (WHERE has all the time gone? Hmmm? I’m looking at you, Dr. Who), she is fast revealing her true colours. In that she is completely, stonkingly, mad. Don’t believe me? Try this for size:

– She has fallen in love with a potato (it lives in her toybox, I replace it once a week, don’t worry)

– She told me on Wednesday the reason she couldn’t go in the house was because (and I quote), “her foot was in the CAR” (made all the more problematic by the fact the car was at work with my husband)

– Yesterday I found her trying to GET INSIDE A PICTURE in the Argos catalogue. It was one of some children in a paddling pool, she couldn’t understand the 2D nature of it all… A hazard of watching too many 3D animations perhaps?

So you can puzzle those, or you can watch a great re-cut of Top Gun as a love story between Tom Cruise and Val Kilmer. I’m calling it BROKEGUN and I’m totally convinced. Have a great weekend.

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17 thoughts on “Weekend Madness”

  1. Aaah, can you smell that??

    That’s the whiff of my sarcasm receding from YOUR blog to be replaced by the stench of your PEDANTRY over here!

    ; )

  2. OMG, now I know why I could never get into Top Gun! mind you with a name like Top Gun could it actually be anything other than homoerotic? Have “they” been laughing at us all these years???

    Nice stories by the way, having spent time with your children recently I can verify the fact they are indeed mad. Not least the girl who has a FACEHUGGER in her doll’s pram instead of well, a dolly. Kinda fitting really though.

  3. Actually Evil, it’s a limited edition Alien Queen chestburster that cost her bloody father a small fortune on bloody eBay. It has been renamed “Rah”. Oh how the mighty fallen, hey? Once she was going to infect the known universe, now she is a child’s plaything. (The Queen would’ve infected the known universe, not Lili…Oh forget it).

  4. LOL! The Patriot also contains scenes of a similar nature BTW.

    Ah, the children…only last night, the son was stuffing his face with a cracker. His father asked him a question and was told to ‘talk to the cracker’

    I remember my daughter at a similar age to Lili telling me that I COULD wash her hair but I mustn’t get it wet.

    Husbands and ebay? Don’t get me started…mine has bought up loads of catholic artefacts including a last rites kit! What’s all that about?

  5. Okay, things are getting really surreal around here. Not really a surprise, but let’s try a new subject. Any suggestions?

  6. Just before you do change subject – my little boy takes a nit comb to bed!!!!! Best of all, when I drop him off at nursery hugging his nit comb to his bosom you can imagine the looks as I try to explain “he hasn’t actually got headlice, he just likes it…”

    How about ‘family’ films after art house – are they even a genre?

  7. If it’s family films can it be good ones and not the ones where you leave with welts round your eyes from trying to scratch them out in horror.

    Sorry. Got dragged to “Hootie heard a Who” or something. I’m still having nightmares.

    And my youngest has an invisible friend. A dog. A dead dog. One that I’d taken away and killed, apparently. But it’s come back. Therapy was mentioned by the head teacher.

  8. offtopic but..

    cor Lucy – so hectic trying to get this survey going – don’t know how you ever managed to do those competition polls !

    Think I’ll retire after this!

  9. I like the way that kids spin logic around. My lad Liam (now 19) once berated me for announcing that I could hear a car alarm going off. “No,” he said, “It’s a car alarm going on.”

    He was seven. Smug little sod.

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