If you mean Him Indoors Dazza, he’s already offered.
And actually, I’m not too upset, this reader clearly doesn’t like the story: s/he even goes on to say “The script is well-written, with good structure, characterisation and dialogue” so that must mean the premise does little to excite them and short of writing an entirely different script, there’s not much you can do about that.
So he/she/it needs some lessons on feedback. You could always offer to give lessons, at a nominal charge of course? So didn’t like the story. There’ll be others out there with more discernment (did I spell that right). Keep chucking it out.
This doesn’t strike as Worst Ever Feedback at all, to be honest madam!
“good writer”…”can tell a story well”… “talents”… not too shabby.
Like you say, they just didn’t like the story and didn’t deem it original enough. Surely it’s better than something like this…
“While you’ve managed to dream up a potentially fine story, sadly your utter lack of talent re: storytelling, plotting, description and dialogue have let your idea down considerably…”
Thanks Guys… Tho I don’t drink wine, gives me migraines. Drank plenty of beer last night tho and that deadened the pain somewhat. Tho now I have a hangover. Bugger.
But actually, as Jase and Rach say, if they don’t like the story, only answer is to keep sending it out.
Wait to hear what they say when they’re paying you.
My first gig involved COMMUNAL first draft meetings. That’s right you got your notes in front of ALL the other writers, script editors, producers. At least one of the writers used to throw up before every meeting.
Some of my favourite comments: “Nicely typed” and (refererring to a blank page) “This was your best work” and (just before going in to get my notes after lunch), “What the fuck happened to you? Your first one was okay but your second script was crap”
I find the Wildean retort “Why don’t we step outside so you can repeat that” calms down most producers.
I’m always fond of quoting the note I got from a BBC Scotland drama exec, “I couldn’t relate to any of the characters as they were all of above-average intelligence.”
Few days late but really sorry about your knock back, Lucy. As everyone else has said– there’s a lot to be positive in the feedback even if it sounds a bit unhelpful to the naked ear.
@ dave C, *that’s* wonderful! You’ve gotta use that in the work at some point. Ah, the things execs give away without meaning to…
My favourite personal rejection story was a bounce back I got from the beeb in response to a pitch I’d made for a proposed spooky anthology series (which, subsequent to my rejection metamorphosised into a single authored two-parter, so I’m not too bitter– there wasn’t any work there at the end of the day anyway).
Anyway, the feedback was that the producer REALLY loved my pitch– only it didn’t fit in with the overall “theme” of the series. A theme I wasn’t aware of in the first place as it wasn’t actually MENTIONED in the pitching brief! Oh, and if my idea *had* been written within that theme it wouldn’t have worked at all (she went on to add).
There’s no real answer to that other than, “I’ll get me coat…”
Bloody hell!
Send whatsisface over to kick their ass. He can do it and melt into the night like the SAS…
If you mean Him Indoors Dazza, he’s already offered.
And actually, I’m not too upset, this reader clearly doesn’t like the story: s/he even goes on to say “The script is well-written, with good structure, characterisation and dialogue” so that must mean the premise does little to excite them and short of writing an entirely different script, there’s not much you can do about that.
Unless s/he doesn’t like your arena.
Couldn’t resist.
Luv Mike
Commiserations chuck!
Why do these things happen on a Friday?
Never forget the healing power of red wine. xx
So he/she/it needs some lessons on feedback. You could always offer to give lessons, at a nominal charge of course? So didn’t like the story. There’ll be others out there with more discernment (did I spell that right). Keep chucking it out.
This doesn’t strike as Worst Ever Feedback at all, to be honest madam!
“good writer”…”can tell a story well”… “talents”… not too shabby.
Like you say, they just didn’t like the story and didn’t deem it original enough. Surely it’s better than something like this…
“While you’ve managed to dream up a potentially fine story, sadly your utter lack of talent re: storytelling, plotting, description and dialogue have let your idea down considerably…”
*hands over large glass of wine and a plaster*
Shell
Thanks Guys… Tho I don’t drink wine, gives me migraines. Drank plenty of beer last night tho and that deadened the pain somewhat. Tho now I have a hangover. Bugger.
But actually, as Jase and Rach say, if they don’t like the story, only answer is to keep sending it out.
Although not as vicious as Jason’s, I liked this feedback I got some time ago:
“I think you’ll find that your title is not actually a word.”
Or how about this one:
“Characters: I only have one word unfortunately and that is “Cliche'”.
Oh, how I laughed 😉
Wait to hear what they say when they’re paying you.
My first gig involved COMMUNAL first draft meetings. That’s right you got your notes in front of ALL the other writers, script editors, producers. At least one of the writers used to throw up before every meeting.
Some of my favourite comments: “Nicely typed” and (refererring to a blank page) “This was your best work” and (just before going in to get my notes after lunch), “What the fuck happened to you? Your first one was okay but your second script was crap”
I find the Wildean retort “Why don’t we step outside so you can repeat that” calms down most producers.
🙂
DD
I’m always fond of quoting the note I got from a BBC Scotland drama exec, “I couldn’t relate to any of the characters as they were all of above-average intelligence.”
Few days late but really sorry about your knock back, Lucy. As everyone else has said– there’s a lot to be positive in the feedback even if it sounds a bit unhelpful to the naked ear.
@ dave C, *that’s* wonderful! You’ve gotta use that in the work at some point. Ah, the things execs give away without meaning to…
My favourite personal rejection story was a bounce back I got from the beeb in response to a pitch I’d made for a proposed spooky anthology series (which, subsequent to my rejection metamorphosised into a single authored two-parter, so I’m not too bitter– there wasn’t any work there at the end of the day anyway).
Anyway, the feedback was that the producer REALLY loved my pitch– only it didn’t fit in with the overall “theme” of the series. A theme I wasn’t aware of in the first place as it wasn’t actually MENTIONED in the pitching brief! Oh, and if my idea *had* been written within that theme it wouldn’t have worked at all (she went on to add).
There’s no real answer to that other than, “I’ll get me coat…”